Think you're confident, persistent, and knowledgeable? What if those strengths are the very things holding you back?
Lisa and Cindy unpack the sales blind spots that can cost you trust, relationships, and business in medical device sales. From coming across as arrogant or pushy to talking too much, ignoring the team, and getting defensive, they share real-world lessons on reading the room and recognizing how your actions make others feel.
The challenge? Ask someone you trust what you might be doing to get in your own way, and listen without defending yourself.
Must-Hear Insights and Key Moments
Know Your Blind Spots - Self-awareness starts with recognizing the habits and behaviors that may be affecting your relationships and results.
Confidence or Arrogance? - Your expertise is valuable, but how you deliver it can determine whether customers see you as a trusted partner or someone who talks down to them.
Persistence Without Pressure - Following up matters, but making customers feel guilty or overwhelmed can push them away instead of moving the relationship forward.
Read the Room - Knowing when to speak, when to listen, and what the physician or staff actually needs can make all the difference.
Your Strengths Can Backfire - Clinical knowledge, enthusiasm, and confidence can become blind spots when they aren't matched to the situation or audience.
Pay Attention to the Signals - Short answers, distracted body language, and unanswered messages may be signs that your approach needs to change.
The Weekly Challenge - Ask someone you trust: βWhat's one thing that I might be doing to get in my own way?β Then listen to their answer without getting defensive.
How Others Experience You - The way you see yourself may not match how others see you. Understanding that gap can help you build stronger relationships and become a more effective sales rep.
Words of Wisdom: Standout Quotes from This Episode
βWhat is it really like to be on the other side of you?β β Cynthia Ficara
βA lot of the best sales reps don't just know their customers, they know themselves.β β Cynthia Ficara
βBlind spots happen when we're in a hurry and when we don't wanna face what we already know but don't wanna admit.β β Cynthia Ficara
βThe minute you start getting defensive, that's a blind spot right there.β β Cynthia Ficara
βIt's how you make people feel.ββ β Cynthia Ficara
βYou think you're persistent, but are you actually annoying?β β Anneliese Rhodes
βThere's nothing wrong with pleasant persistence, but when it becomes pressurizing, then you've gone too far, and that's a blind spot.β β Anneliese Rhodes
βYou have to be able to read the room very well and know how you're gonna react to it in the correct way with that specific audience.β β Anneliese Rhodes
βLet's not talk too much. Let's just move on, you know? Right. Let's be quiet. Let's be observant.β β Anneliese Rhodes
βEvery sales call is a new beginning with a physician, because it is, takes an instant to lose credibility and trustworthiness with physicians.β β Anneliese Rhodes
Follow The Girls of Gritβ’:
We'd Love to Hear Your Stories!
Have you ever thought you were being helpful, only to realize you might have been coming across as pushy, overconfident, or out of touch? Think about a time when someone gave you feedback that changed how you approached a customer relationship. What did you learn about yourself? Weβd love to hear about the moment you discovered a blind spot and how becoming more self-aware helped you grow as a sales professional.
Blog Transcript:
Note: We use AI transcription so there may be some inaccuracies
The Sales Blind Spots You Might Be Missing
Cindy: You think you're confident, but do they think you're arrogant?
Lisa: You think you're persistent, but are you actually annoying?
Cindy: Here's the million dollar question. What is it really like to be on the other side of you?
Lisa: Let's talk about the sales blind spots that could actually be costing you your business
Welcome everyone to another episode of Secrets in Medical Device Sales, brought to you by Annalisa Rhodes and Cynthia Fakhra. We are so thrilled to bring you guys another great episode today. This one actually came to mind, for me anyhow, when I was listening to a podcast. I'm trying to remember now. Oh, you know what, Cynthia?-
It was on the John Maxwell podcast. That's right.
Cindy: Oh.
Lisa: Yeah. Okay., I had not listened to his podcast in a while, and the other day I just had it on the bed as I was folding clothes, and I was like, "You know what? I'm gonna listen to it." So it was all about blind spots, and I am just super excited to talk about this today because right after that podcast, I ended up having a call with someone, another rep, who had a couple blind spots.
And, you know, it just brings to mind, we think we know everything, and sometimes, we know a lot, right? But what about the things that you think you know or that you think you're doing but you may be not doing them very well and would be considered a blind spot of yours? And even a better question, who is the person that should be pointing out the blind spots to you, and are you the kind of person that can handle hearing about their blind spots?
So it's good- I- ... discussions today.
Cindy: I'm excited. Well, you know what? Something else to take from that when we're out driving, pulling up old podcasts you haven't listened to or just throwing yourself back into something you haven't heard in a while is one of my favorite things to do because it just opens your eyes to things.
Again, we talk about always learning and always being curious, and John Maxwell, everything that he says- Yeah ... is valuable. And you know, Lisa, I just, it makes me think about I'm sure we've all been in this situation. So if you're listening and you're thinking, if you've ever walked out of a meeting and you're all excited and you're like, " Woo-hoo, I nailed this."
"This is great." And then you're like, "Oh, everything was great." And then what happens if their reception wasn't the same as yours?
Lisa: Yep. And the follow-up isn't there. You go back and it's crickets, and you're like, " What did I do wrong? Did I do anything?" What did I miss? What's happening?"
Or you get, a big Heisman from the doctor when you see him walking down the hallway and you're like, " Wait a minute. I was talking to you a couple weeks ago or a month ago. You know, "What am I missing here?" So I think today is a great discussion about blind spots. We all have them.
Nobody's immune from them. Yep. I know I can have them. Sometimes it's hard- Me too ... sometimes it's hard for me to hear them. But, I think it's a good way to just continually, up your game and be a better person, a better sales representative, a leader, a mentor. Whatever it is, it's important that when those blind spots are pointed out to you, that you listen, you know?
And maybe you heed a little bit of the advice of the person or people that are telling you about it.
Cindy: That's excellent advice. And actually, you know what? Maybe since we're kind of setting the stage and before we really dive into an important conversation, let's, reveal our secret,
Lisa: Yeah, yeah ...
Cindy: what is the secret? We're talking the subject of blind spots, and we're not just reading the room, but we're kind of recognizing how you show up in that room. You agree, Lisa?
Lisa: Yep, I agree. Mm-hmm.
Cindy: And,a lot of the best sales reps don't just know their customers, they know themselves.
Self-Awareness: The Secret to Better Selling
Cindy: So the secret that we're revealing today is a common theme in our podcast, and it's self-awareness. I mean, it's kind of an obvious secret, so maybe it's- Yeah ... not such a secret secret. But, I think that I wanted to kind of point that out because as you listen to us, just start thinking of yourself, start thinking of situations, or start thinking of someone that you're close with that maybe you can help.
Because again, this is what we're all here to do, impact women in this fiedl and just really grow to be better version of yourself.
Lisa: Absolutely, and men too, because we do have men that listen as well. 100%. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Don't forget the men, right? Um, so I feel like we, kind of just talked a little bit about a good example.
Or example of a person and, without getting too in depth with it, I did have a discussion, like I mentioned at the beginning, with another representative. And I basically was just like, "Listen, I don't know if you know this, but sometimes the way that things are delivered is a little kind of in your face.
It's almost too much. And I'm not saying that you don't know what you're talking about. I'm not saying that you aren't clinically savvy. I'm not saying any of that." In fact, this person is very clinically savvy, but they struggle a little bit with feeling the, not just self-awareness, but kind of reading the room as well, that emotional intelligence, Cindy, that you and I have talked about so many times, and I think it's so important.
I mean, a lot of times we deal with customers that may not have that emotional intelligence level like we do, but it is your job as the sales rep or the leader or the whoever you are, the VP of sales person, you have to be able to read the room very well and know how you're gonna react to it in the correct way with that specific audience.
So, you know- 100% ... I think a good example of this is, and I've seen it so many times, it, like, kills me. But it's like you see the rep that walks in, and they go into, the staff meeting or even into the OR, and they're trying to tell the staff all this stuff, right, about their product. They're like, "Well, you gotta do this, and you gotta do that, and it's great for this, and it's great for that.
And you gotta tell Dr. So-and-so. And please pass on my name," And all the staff really is trying to think about at that point in time is, " Dude, I just need you to tell me what I need to get this thing. How do I prep it? you know, how is it prepared? how do I get it ready for the surgeon?
I need you to leave me alone 'cause I have a million other things on my plate, counting needles, right, and making sure the instruments are correct," and all the things that you need to start a procedure that that rep just absolutely takes them way off their game. And then they're pissed, and then their attention span is shortened and, their patience is lost.
And then you got the doctor that walks in, and he's like, " Where is this and that?" And then the tech looks at you like, "This is your fault," right? So, like, how many times do you see that? And the rep is only excited about their product. They're only trying to give the information because they're so excited about talking about it, or they really wanna impression upon the person or people that it's important.
But they forget to read the room and understand, okay, currently we are in the OR. There is a little bit of a rush to things, right? Like, things need to start happening. This really probably isn't the time for me to tell them about all the data and all the doctors that are using it and all this. Maybe the time really is just to prep them for the case.
Cindy: Yeah. I can't agree with you more. And you know what's crazy is that's a great example. And I feel like there's many, many examples to blind spots. And I think, part of the reason we have 'em is we get over-confident in where we are. All right, let's take for instance if you are somebody who's just starting, and then you're in training, and you come out of training, and you're like, " Okay, I know this."
It's not like when you were in high school- Yeah ... or like junior high, when you just memorize, read the test, and forget it.Iit's not knowledge forgotten, and not all of a sudden you're like, "Oh, I know what I'm doing. I'm through training. I got everything." Then it's like a year later and you look back and you say, "Oh my gosh, I didn't know anything.
How did I think I knew what I was doing?" Yeah. But, so like how do we fix that time period? How do we fix that moment that we're in when we think we know everything and we don't? And I gotta tell you, I think some of it is, like, shortcuts. Some of it is we just wanna get through the day, and, oh, we think it's fine.
And we don't really take the time to truly analyze every step we're in- And take the time to listen to your customers, get your feedback, and be in the moment. And I think blind spots happen when we're in a hurry and when we don't wanna face what we already know but don't wanna admit, you know?
When Your Strengths Become Your Weaknesses
Lisa: Well, yeah.
What you're talking about is a strength that can be a disadvantage, right? Yeah. So I think, a lot of times we have all these, like I was saying, I mean, you could be clinically savvy and amazing, and that's a strength, but if it's delivered the wrong way or presented the wrong way, then it becomes a disadvantage or a weakness.
Yes. So, you just talked about confidence. Sometimes confidence can come off as arrogance, and nobody wants to work- Oh, yeah ... with an arrogant rep, right? Like, everybody knows those reps, and boy, are they just, like, I even wanna walk away from it. It's just so gross. So, confidence can definitely become arrogance.
I think another one, and this is one of the things that I saw with this particular rep, there's a difference between Patient persistence. Or, pressure, right? And, sometimes things can factor into that feeling of that pressure, right?
Maybe you're behind your number, you need to get the sale in. You know that you need to hit your number, and you're feeling all this pressure, and so you're persistent. And there's nothing wrong with pleasant persistence. That's what I was looking for. Oh, I like that. There's nothing wrong with the pleasant persistence, but when it becomes pressurizing, then you've gone too far, and that's a blind spot.
And I can absolutely say I have done that in the past, Cindy, where I am so persistent, I am too much, and doctors are like, "Whoa, let me step back a little bit, honey. Not even that you haven't earned that, but sometimes it's just you put people off, you can do that to staff.
You can do that to physicians. Yeah, I mean, it's a problem.
Cindy: I think this is an excellent example, because in sales, we're always persistent. And I think this can be a blind spot of being over-persistent. Yeah. And, that pressure is the desperate selling, I sent you an email.
You didn't answer," da, da, blah, blah. So maybe it's not even- Yeah ... so much of what you're actually doing, but you need to stop and think of how you are saying it. So if you want to follow up, okay, say you've, you said you were gonna know something by, say, Friday. Let's just make an example. You're going in.
You're waiting to hear back from a committee, okay? Or somebody on the committee. And they say, "We'll let you know by Friday." Well, Friday afternoon comes. You don't hear a thing. You send an email. Now, we know some people leave early, and then it's Monday, you don't hear anything. And then Tuesday morning, you either send another email or you call, and you're not getting any answer, so you go to the hospital.
Okay, so now you've earned that, " I didn't hear back. I'm following up." Yeah. But now this is where you have to pull away all these blind spots. Tilt the mirror. Look at it. And when you go to ask them, it's your voice, it's your tone. Yeah. It's, "I'm here to help you. Is there another further step that you need?"
Yeah. "What else do we need to get to that line? Did I miss something?"
Lisa: That is a perfect way to say that. it's not a, " I emailed you, I called you, I did this, I did that, and you're not, you're ghosting me," right? Like- Right ... you don't need to point out the obvious to them Like,
Cindy: left, right, whatever it is.
Lisa: They know that, yeah. You're so right. When you finally do that next step of going in and going to the hospital and seeing the physician or the purchasing or whatever it is- It's almost like you kind of got to, like you said, tilt the mirror. Take a step back now. Now we're gonna go back to our heels a little bit and we're just gonna be like, " Hey, you know, I just thought I would follow up.
Don't want to be too overwhelming, but I want to make sure that I'm doing my part in making sure that all the boxes are checked for you. Yeah ... is there something that's missing?" And you- You don't need to bring up that you've called and texted them 10 million times.
Cindy: And you mentioned confidence and persistence as one of those strengths, excellent sales strengths, but can also be a disadvantage.
There's another thing I'm thinking about and that's enthusiasm. And enthusiasm and passion when it's natural and it's, just genuine, is the most amazing sales strength. Yeah. And even if people don't hear what you say, they feel your enthusiasm. But then- Mm ... there's the opposite. Enthusiasm can be overwhelming when it's not tailored down.
And,I think back to like everybody in high school knew that girl or that guy, obnoxious, loud, overwhelming, because enthusiasm about something isn't like a party. Again, in medical device, this is all serious business that we do. Getting excited is one thing. Getting overwhelming and loud and obnoxious- Yeah
is a different level of excitement. Again, this is just something you kind of need to look in the mirror and see. So if you go in to do an in-service, you used that example in the morning, that was a great example of when you start your day and you're trying to tell the staff, " Oh, I've got this or that," but are you loud and excited?
Do they have eye contact? Yeah. Are they watching what you're doing? is it something that they're totally dismissing? I've seen enthusiasm where it absolutely hurts you. So-
Lisa: Oh my gosh, like the rep that's just so loud. Yes, I know. I agree with you on that one.
But you're right, there's nothing wrong with being excited about your product. You just have to do it the right way.
Cindy: Yep.
Lisa: Another thing that we were talking about kind of with the clinical knowledge is, like, your expertise, right?
Cindy: Yeah ...
Lisa: I've been doing, certain sales for over 20 years, right?
So I would consider myself being an expert in that field. But it's not to the point where I'm like, "I'm gonna correct somebody if they..." You know, like a physician or a staff member or anything like that. Now, if something's going wrong with the product, then obviously you need to correct that, you need to troubleshoot, you need to make sure you're out ahead of that.
But this is a different situation. This is more like if somebody says something and you're like, "Oh, no. That's not the way this goes." That is really, probably could be delivered a little bit better than just this kind of teacher to student type thing. I mean, again, there's nothing wrong with mentoring but, it's funny, it's almost like this is...
All the things that we're talking about, it's like this art, right? It's like this, ability to finesse. Because there's a line that you don't wanna cross because when you cross that line, you're now in your blind spot, and people are seeing it and you're not, and then it just gets worse.
Cindy: I love that.
It is a finesse. And, something just came to mind when you were talking, and I feel that, and I think we can all relate to this, is I think a good way to summarize what you just said about expertise and knowledge is some people come across condescending. And I think that- Oh, that's a great word
knowledge, I mean, knowledge is part of what we're doing, right. Again, take out a mirror and just realize, when you've got something very important to say and share, just share it in a partnership tone, in an encouraging tone, not a condescending tone. Not like, we've all had one of those teachers in high school that made you feel stupid because they thought they knew it all.
We don't want that. Oh my gosh.
Lisa: That's not- I
Cindy: know ... what we're here to do. There's no hierarchy ranking of knowledge competition. It's like, throw it out there in the right way.
Lisa: You just totally reminded me, so Brooklyn has been struggling with this- teacher. I'm not gonna say what subject. I'm just gonna say a teacher.
And I guess, 'cause I'm like, "Brooklyn, why don't you just ask her the question?" Like, if she's taking a quiz, I'm like, " If you had just asked the teacher the question of clarification, you would've gotten this correct instead of getting it incorrect." She's like, "I'm scared." I'm like, "Why are you scared?" She goes, "Because the teacher makes everybody feel like crap for asking a question."
I'm like, "That's terrible." But she's like, "Yeah, well, it's an advanced class, so the teacher looks at you like you're dumb if you're gonna ask a question." And I'm like, " This is not what we need." But, you know, I mean, that's the same thing, right? Like, you don't need to look at somebody and be like,
They should know that answer." I mean, that's just not part of your job as the rep, as the mentor, to look at somebody and be like, " You should know this by now." So I agree with you. Condescending is a great word.
Cindy: So to elaborate on that- Yeah ... because I feel like exactly what you just said, it's not even so much about the conversation that your daughter had with the teacher, it's how the teacher makes her feel.
Lisa: Mm, yeah.
Cindy: And so part of the secret of self-awareness is knowing how you make people feel. Yes ... I think that's really, really important. Um- Great point,
Lisa: Cindy. It's a great point.
Cindy: Yeah.
Lisa: Sorry ... I was gonna say, sometimes it's not even just your strength that can be a disadvantage.
Cindy: I feel some other areas that you can have blind spots in medical device is talking too much.
Lisa: Yes, so common. Oh my gosh. How many times are you in that room with that rep and they just won't stop talking? Right. Like, they talk
Cindy: incessantly,
Lisa: and you're like, "Dude, shut up. We're in the middle of a case." I mean- "We don't need you talking all the time.
The doctor definitely doesn't need you talking." I mean, I don't know of any physician, even the nicest of the nicest, that want to deal with the incessant talking. Nope ... none of them want that, because they have other things going on in their head, if anything, during the case. So yeah. Let's not talk too much.
Let's just move on, you know? Right.
Read the Room, Listen More, and Put Customers First
Lisa: Let's be quiet. Let's be observant. I mean, what do they say, being a good listener first? Yeah. That's what you need to do, you know? I think another one is pushing what you need, your agenda, before the needs of others. And what I mean by that is that patient persistence or- Yeah
pleasant persistence versus the pushiness, right? Because you have an agenda. Okay, you gotta meet a number, you need to sell a device, you need to get this case, you need to get 10 more cases. I don't know, whatever it is on your agenda that day or that week, but nobody else needs to know about that. It's not their business of what your agenda is, what your quota is.
They don't care. They just want to know that your agenda means that you're there to support the case and do well for the patient and the physician that's in the room, right? So your agenda does not need to come forward or come out any time during the day, or evening for that matter, in your job. Your agenda is only what you do with your manager when the time is coming.
Cindy: Yep. just more obvious blind spot is sometimes, and I knew a rep like this, it was probably a good decade ago, who would go into a room and only talk to the physician. I mean, this guy- Oh, yeah ... literally put his eye- Like, I can remember one of the circulating nurses, training this person at the time, was like, " Dude, he's completely ignoring me and he doesn't realize I'm the one-
Lisa: You're the one that's bo-
Cindy: what's it called? The puppeteer who puts them all on the strings. Yeah. And so I don't see that very often, but I have seen where they're just, "I don't need to talk to you. I just talk to the doctor." I mean, look, it's a team effort, so don't be blind.
That's almost like ignorant blind spot- Yeah ... that you just need to kind of include everyone. Don't overlook people.
Lisa: Yeah, I think
Cindy: that's- Not that many people do.
Lisa: Yeah, I
Cindy: think that's- Good reminder.
Lisa: Yeah, yeah. For sure.
Cindy: I think maybe- See, what are some other
Lisa: ones?
Cindy: Any
Lisa: other
Cindy: ones
Lisa: you
Cindy: can think of?
Lisa: Maybe trying to just prove your value over others, prove yourself over competition, just constantly trying to do things.
I mean, there's nothing wrong with being the most knowledgeable person in the room, knowing things, but do it with a sense of humbleness and maybe not arrogance. I think when you get that like, "Oh, I gotta sell, I gotta sell, I gotta push, I'm new," or, "I've been doing this for forever.
Why am I not getting the sale?" And it starts to get into your psyche, and then so that now you're trying to prove yourself in every way you can. Every step you take, you're trying to prove who you are, and people don't need that, right? Number one, actions speak louder than words, but number two, let's be humble with who we are, why we're there.
Don't over assume your relationship with physicians. Every sales call is a new beginning with a physician, because it is, takes an instant to lose credibility and trustworthiness with physicians.
Cindy: And when you said humbled, or let me just make one more, just one more example so everybody can think of these if you can't think of your own examples, is how many times we have a conversation and either we're told no or, like, it's an objection, and you get defensive.
So it's like you think you have to completely tell them they're wrong. Oh my gosh, yeah. But maybe that's an opportunity to just understand where- Yeah ... they are in the sales process, what their issue is and what they're facing. So I think sometimes objections- Such a great point, Cindy ... our reaction- Yeah
can be a blind spot. And, when you just said the word humbled, it really triggered that because- Yeah ... again, the art, the finesse, the self-awareness, these are all things that tie into client kind of blind spots. So-
Lisa: Yeah ...
Cindy: all right, Lisa, we'll move on to think about certain-
Lisa: Things that- ...
Cindy: signs.
Lisa: Yeah ... clues.
Signs. Clues. Signs. Things that you should be picking up on.
Cindy: Yes. So what are some things that maybe, people often miss? if you're in a situation where you're doing something with your blind spot on-
Lisa: Yeah. It's almost like duh.
Recognize the Signs You're Pushing Too Hard
Lisa: When you're talking to people and they're giving you short answers or they're distracted or they're just not paying attention, right? They're trying to change the conversation. They're trying to get out of the conversation with you. Like, you should be picking up on those clues of saying, " Ooh, maybe I'm pushing too much," or you know what?
They've got other things on their plate. They're busy. They need to go. The whole example of the rep walking into the room during the setup for the case and he or she is, like, spewing every little bit of data that they can to the tech, who literally just needs you to tell them how to prep the device so that they can move on and do all the other things, right?
So their answers are gonna be, "Yep. Got it. Okay, great. Okay. Okay, thanks. if they say, "Okay, thanks," that's, your kind of clue to just stop talking. Yeah. You know? Let's not keep pushing, right?
Cindy: Yeah. It's- Those short answers really are enough. That's what they're trying to say.
But then in that, I'm taking it a step further, is body language. You know what I mean? Are you- Oh, yeah ... are they turning away from you? Yeah. Are they walking away? Are they not looking at you? Are they not interested? Are they not engaging? I mean, look, we've all had situations where maybe you're having, a discussion with a spouse or a boyfriend or fiancΓ© and, it's an important conversation, and they're walking away, and you're like, " Pay attention.
Listen to me. Why are you not looking at me?" You know?
Lisa: Yeah.
Cindy: Like, hello. If you're in the OR and people turn away in a more subtle fashion, it's the same thing. These are clues you need to pay attention to and not miss so you can pivot. Yeah. You know? Yeah. This is always what we're doing.
Lisa: Yep. Yeah, I mean, I think an obvious one, another obvious one is, like, legit you get the Heisman.
You're getting ghosted. Ugh. Like, your physicians are not replying to you. It's kind of like, oh, smack. What did I do wrong? Did I push too hard? Did I come on too strong? What did I do wrong, right? Let me backpedal a little. I mean, I've gotten that a lot of times, right? I can absolutely be overwhelming. I get it.
I can be a lot. So I think, sometimes I need to redirect that energy and do it a different way. And so when that happens to me, and it's happened just recently, I stop immediately the action, right? I stop the messages, I stop the emails, I stop whatever, and you give some time, right?
Sometimes people just need a little bit of time for you to back off. They need for you to let things simmer back down. Let's not get to a boiling point. Even if all the information that you had gotten so far was so positive, this doctor's like, "I wanna use you. I'm gonna use you for everything.
Bring in your stuff. We'll get it approved. Don't you worry. I got you." And then the very next day or the next week it's like crickets, right? That's a hard pill to swallow.
Cindy: It is.
Lisa: I have had to swallow those pills multiple times. Oops, I just put my hand up. That was funny. Look at that. When you put your hand up, it's like, "Oh, I got a question."
Cindy: Hello.
Lisa: Anyhow, um, yeah, I mean, boy, that's a hard pill to swallow, especially for somebody like me who's been doing this for forever. I'm like, "Dude, I should be past this," right? I should beyond this at this point. But the truth is, I don't know if we ever get beyond that, Cindy. No. I have seen VPs and CEOs get Heismaned from physicians.
Yeah. So I'm not gonna feel too bad when it happens to me, and I'm just gonna understand that they're busy. They have their own agendas. There's other things going on in their life, whether it's personal, it's professional, it's both. You know, the patient overload. Maybe they're on call. Maybe they didn't see your message 'cause they're on call and they just don't check all their messages all the time, or they saw it and then it slipped their mind, right?
So like- Yep ... I think for when that happens to you, don't feel like you're alone. You're not. It, it literally happens to everybody. But just take a step back and notice it and say, "Okay, this is happening. These are my markers. I'm being too overwhelming. I'm being too pushy. I need to step back. Let me see my blind spot so that I can reassess how I'm gonna go forward with this doctor."
Cindy: A follow-up to that is don't forget the silent Heisman. Okay, so what you said is right. That's the obvious Heisman, but the silent Heisman is when, you're in a meeting and it's calm, friendly, whatever, and you're like, "Okay, that kind of went well." But then afterwards, there's no follow-up, there's no meaningful, next steps in the process.
They stall your, whole procedure, Or the process that you're trying to do. So maybe it was just how you came across in a meeting, you know? Yeah. Maybe it was good information, but hey, they might have read it completely wrong than you. Yeah. I agree. So like, there are things to think about.
Not only is it the obvious people turning away, but when you don't get any follow-up, not necessarily ghosting, but when nobody's really trying to help you-
Lisa: Yeah ...
Cindy: pull through, that's not good.
Lisa: I agree.
Cindy: So how do we uncover-
Lisa: Yep,
Cindy: yeah ... our blind spots?
Lisa: Well, I think one of the best things is, and I'm pretty good about this, is bouncing things off of other people, right?
Asking somebody that you trust, a mentor, a friend, a colleague, " Hey, listen, this is my situation. This is what's currently happening. What do you think?" That's enough of a self-awareness right there of saying, " I'm screwing this up. How can I make it better?"
Right? So I think if you're able to do that, if you're able to get to the point of even recognizing that you're screwing it up, that's fantastic. So now let's fix it, right, by going to somebody that you can trust that they can help you. And, usually good people, good friends are gonna be, like, unbiased, right?
They're gonna be like- Yep ... "Oh, well, maybe you came across a little too harsh, Lisa, or a little too pushy. I would give it some time and then circle back, and here's how I would circle back." And then you gotta be able to take that criticism, that constructive criticism, and say, " You know what? I appreciate it.
Thank you."
Cindy: That is one of the hardest things to do.
Lisa: It is.
Cindy: And when you ask for the help, now you have to listen.
Lisa: Yes.
Cindy: And you've got- Yes ... to not be defensive, because the minute you start getting defensive, that's a blind spot right there. You know something's not working, you're reaching out for help.
Yeah. And the minute somebody tells you something you don't wanna hear, if you deflect back being defensive, that's a clue. So helping, having somebody help you when you ask for help is one way, but here's another thing. Whether you are, a trainer in your team, whether you're a more senior rep, maybe you're a leader in your field listening to this, I think what's really important is also the unsolicited feedback for this.
Yeah. To say, Hey, you know, you're talking about this," but on the flip side you can say, " Will you allow me to give you some feedback? Will you allow me to talk to you about something that I think I see that you don't see?"
Lisa: 100%.
Cindy: And some people may be open to that. Sometimes you get so caught up in what's not working or you're busy and you're just trying to figure it out that you're not even stopping to look.
But somebody who is a good friend or a mentor, it kinda goes both ways. Like you said- Yeah ... number one, ask for the feedback, but number two, nicely ask somebody if they want your feedback if you see something obvious you could help them with.
Lisa: Yeah, that's a good point. Sometimes I don't ask people if they want my feedback, I just give it.
So- It's really bad ...
Cindy: in all fairness, it depends on the situation, right? I mean- True. Yeah, yeah ... if your conversation is with somebody close- Yeah ... of course, and, depending on the hierarchy in your job, sometimes it's your job to do that. I mean, again, like- This is true. No, this is true ... as leaders-
Lisa: Yeah
Cindy: it is our job to really coach and help. So-
Lisa: Yeah ...
Cindy: I think that's good.
Lisa: Should we give them marching orders? I feel like this has been a good episode, but we should give some people some marching orders. What do you think?
Cindy: Yes. I like that.
Lisa: Your call to action.
Cindy: All right. so before we get into the call to action- Yeah
I want you to just, the little reflection questions like, what's one thing that I don't see how I come across? Maybe that's somebody you can ask.
Cindy: and, how do people d- Describe, Okay, put it
Lisa: this- Ooh, that's actually good. How do people describe you? Is that what you're about to say?
Cindy: Yeah, or do they describe you different. Like, okay, if you would describe- Yeah ... how do you describe yourself, right? Yeah. But then would people do it the same way?
Lisa: Oh.
Cindy: Like, maybe jot it down yourself.
Lisa: That's a
Cindy: good one. But,
Lisa: Yeah ...
Cindy: I feel like-
Lisa: But I'm sure that everybody listening to this has been told at one point in their life, " You are X, Y, Z type of person," or, "You can c- sometimes come across this way as blah, blah, blah, blah, blah."
I mean, I get it all the time, so I'm just curious. I bet... I would say that everybody probably listening has been told at some point in their life kind of by others, whether solicited or unsolicited, " Hey, you're kind of coming across this way," or, "You come across this way." Right.
Ask for Feedback and Challenge Your Blind Spots
Cindy: So I would say our call to action is a simple question to ask yourself.
What is it really like to be on the other side of me? That's really good. So the second part of that- I like that ... is I do want you to reach out to someone you trust, and simply ask them, "What's one thing that I might be doing- Yeah ... to get in my own way?" And let them tell you without defending yourself, but go to a trusted person.
I love when you said that, Lisa, because I think that's so important in our own personal growth. So that's your challenge for the week. Go ask somebody their honest opinion.
Lisa: Yeah. I love it. All right. Hope you guys enjoyed our episode today. Thank you for continuing to join in. And write to us and tell us any questions, concerns, any new things you want us to talk about.
Talk to y'all soon. Bye.
Cindy: Bye.
