The Anatomy of a Powerful, Professional Apology
Ever wondered if apologizing could actually boost your credibility instead of showing weakness?
In this episode, Lisa and Cindy dive into the art of professional apologies because in medical device sales, how you own a mistake matters more than the mistake itself.
From avoiding overexplaining, ghosting, blame-shifting, or over-apologizing, to delivering a concise, clear, and impactful apology, they break down real-world scenarios you’ll face with surgeons, staff, and patients.
Learn actionable steps to acknowledge mistakes, remove ego, repair trust, and turn slip-ups into opportunities to stand out as a reliable, confident, high performer in 2026.
Must-Hear Insights and Key Moments
Overexplainer Trap – Why giving too much detail weakens your apology and makes you seem unsure.
The Ghost – Avoid delaying uncomfortable conversations; addressing mistakes promptly shows professionalism.
Blame Shifter – Shifting responsibility destroys credibility; ownership builds trust.
Over Apologizer – Saying “sorry” too much can make you seem insecure; less is more.
Ego-Free Apology – Remove ego, focus on facts, and lead with clarity to repair relationships.
Acknowledge Impact – Recognize how your mistake affects surgeons, staff, and patients.
Plan Forward – Share concrete next steps to prevent future missteps and reinforce trust.
Tone & Timing – Deliver apologies in person, calmly, warmly, and without delay for maximum impact.
Words of Wisdom: Standout Quotes from This Episode
“You won’t be judged by the mistake you make, but by how you repair it.” - Cynthia Ficara
“Ghosting or delaying only makes the elephant in the room bigger.” - Cynthia Ficara
“Blame-shifting erodes credibility; ownership builds partnerships.” - Cynthia Ficara
“A good apology focuses on the future, not the failure itself.” - Cynthia Ficara
“Tone, delivery, and timing are the icing on the cake of an apology.” - Cynthia Ficara
“You will not be judged by a mistake, but you will be judged by how you repair it. ” - Cynthia Ficara
“Professionalism in medical devices isn’t optional, it's a power move.” - Anneliese Rhodes
“Your surgeons aren’t perfect, and they expect the same from you.” - Anneliese Rhodes
“Owning a mistake shows maturity, reliability, and credibility.” - Anneliese Rhodes
“Acknowledging the impact of your misstep is what makes an apology weighty.” - Anneliese Rhodes
“Check your ego, apologize sincerely, and then show how you’ll fix it.” - Anneliese Rhodes
“A good apology will focus more on the future and what you're going to do rather than harping on the failure itself.” - Anneliese Rhodes
Follow The Girls of Grit:
We'd Love to Hear Your Stories!
Ever had a moment in the field where you knew you messed up, and you had to apologize on the spot? Maybe a device didn’t arrive on time, or a case went sideways, and suddenly you had to own it with a client or surgeon. We’ve all been there those moments that test your professionalism, confidence, and mindset. We’d love to hear your story.
DM us or tag us and share a time you broke through the illusion of procrastination and took action anyway. Your story might be the reminder another woman in sales needs to stop waiting for perfection and start moving with purpose featured on the next episode of The Girls of Grit.
A Team Dklutr production
Blog Transcript:
Note: We use AI transcription so there may be some inaccuracies
Anneliese Rhodes: Welcome everyone to another episode of Secrets and Medical Device Sales, brought to you by the Girls of Grit. Welcome to 2026.
Cynthia Ficara: Happy New Year everybody. And it's a new year, so you know what that means. New things, good things. I hope we're charged and energized and really ready to see what's gonna take us to the next level.
Apologizing as a Power Move
And the fun part about today is we are gonna start with a conversation. That maybe not everybody wants to talk about. And that's why we thought it's a new year, it's a new you. Let's start off on the right foot. And so, many of you high performers are gonna face a moment that you may run into that makes you uncomfortable.
And what we're really talking about is when you make a mistake. When you make a mistake, and at times you know you need to apologize. But it might feel scary. It might be like, oh, I need to apologize or not. But what we wanted to really, really focus on is how to apologize in the correct way. Meaning like apologize in ways that build trust that's genuine, but you don't break trust and break any of the momentum that you've been building all the way back in 2025.\
Anneliese Rhodes: I love this topic. I am so glad that this is what we are opening up our 2026 with because what is a better way to start a new year than, like you said, a start a new year and being open and honest and you know, really working on ourselves. And I think apologizing is a key attribute. That everybody should have.
Right. In your relationships, in your marriage or your partnership at work? anything really in life, I feel like being able to apologize and do it correctly and well. And yes, there isn't art to apologizing. I'm just so glad we're gonna talk about this today, Cindy, because you're right at some point.
You are gonna have to face this. I mean, everybody faces this to some degree in their job and their work life, but in medical devices it is really important that you understand how to do it because the people that you're apologizing to are brilliant. They're working on patients' lives. There's a lot at stake at all times, and I think it's just such an art to doing it in medical devices.
So I'm really happy that we're talking about this today.
Cynthia Ficara: I am too, So on that note, let's dive right in. And I think when we're talking about apologies, we really want you to get out of this episode thinking how to do it correctly.
Remember, I just kind of went over that, but you want that credibility to stay. So let's think of it like this. Why is apologizing a power move? Because if you think about it as a high performer. In medical device, it really is a power move. So maybe if you don't know what we're talking about, let's just kind of get you to understand what the thoughts at Lisa and I have about this.
Is that okay. In medical device, if you apologize, really want you to understand, it doesn't show that you're weak. It doesn't show that you don't know something. What it's actually showing is that you are reliable. That they can rely on you because we are all human and there's gonna be moments that actually don't add up the way we calculated them to, or something goes wrong.
And maybe it was something that you were thinking three steps ahead and you weren't paying attention or focusing at that moment. Whatever the reason may be, doesn't matter why, but it matters that it's acknowledged and it is not a weakness. And
Anneliese Rhodes: you know why? I'm think as I'm sitting here listening to you, Cindy, it's making me think, why is it important that we acknowledge when we've made a mistake or we didn't know something or we made the wrong move?
Why is that? It's so important in medical devices and to me. It's because there's a patient on the table, and again, like you said, surgeons aren't perfect. The staff isn't perfect, nobody's perfect, right? Everybody makes mistakes. So do your surgeons, and they easily correct those or as quickly as they can, they correct them, but they also expect that out of you.
They expect you to be on that same level as them. So if you screw up or if you did something wrong, or whatever the situation was, they are expecting that same level of owning your stuff and acknowledging it and moving forward and figuring out how to best. Make it better the quickest way possible, I guess is what I'm trying to say.
I think, I think a good word. What you're trying to say is professionalism. Yeah. Yeah. There you go. Yeah. What they expect is they expect professionalism. So what is professionalism as a power movement? Apologizing. It's what you started to say. It's, Owning a misstep, right? Because that shows that you are experienced, you're mature, you are reliable.
Cynthia Ficara: We use that word, it's gonna build credibility, but it's also gonna strengthen what they need out of you, which is a partner, because they're not going to judge you because you made a mistake. But yeah. But a surgeon. Your team there, the staff, the administrators, they will judge you if you don't repair it.
I want you to take that, sink that in for a little bit, that you will not be judged by a mistake, but you will be judged by how you repair it. So that's love's what we are talking about as a power move.
The 4 Mistakes Reps Make When Apologizing
Anneliese Rhodes: Yeah. that's so perfect. okay, so should we talk about kind of the mistake you and I were talking about this earlier, you know, kind of
Some common mistakes that we as reps can make. Um, oh yeah. So we named 'em. Yeah, we named 'em. And you know what? I'm totally guilty of potentially all of these. Maybe not one of them, but I'm pretty much guilty of every other one of 'em. all right. So the first one is, and it's okay, right? I'm being vulnerable here.
So the first one is the over explainer. I'm raising my hand on that one. Guilty. Yeah. Guilty. Very guilty. Guilty. You feel like if you ramble and you're giving all these excuses and you're adding all this unnecessary detail to the situation, it's like, well this happened and that happened and you know, I was thinking about this and I really had this in mind, but this is what.
they don't care. But that's your Over explainer. Actually, it's sounding like you're trying to justify it, but you're not justifying it. You're literally like throwing blame on everything. But it's like the blame game.
Cynthia Ficara: You know what's crazy? when you started, we were talking about this and, when we named it the over explainer, the more you talked, the more I felt less and less like the apology meant anything.
Oh yeah. Honestly. So I almost think that the more you try to make it better, you're making it worse because you are taking away the ownership. You just, you know what I mean? So it's a real common. We called it a mistake. But yeah. So the number one common mistake, which I am guilty, and Lisa says she is as well mm-hmm.
Is over explaining. So in this new year, that is something I need to pay attention to, and that is gonna be something that I need my little antennas up. but I think it's really, really great. Okay. The next one we called it the ghost. Not ghosting, but the ghost. Right. So. Anytime something needs an apology, it's almost like you can feel an elephant in a room.
You can almost mm-hmm. Feel like there's something there. But the ghost, we describe that as delaying the conversation simply because it's uncomfortable. Yeah. And or not
Anneliese Rhodes: even having it. Right. Like, not even wanting to have it and hoping it's just gonna go away.
Cynthia Ficara: Get just run away. Can't run away from it. You know what?
And then it becomes so much bigger. It's like the elephant gets bigger and bigger and bigger and bigger in the room because you ran away from something that needed to be addressed and it didn't. So we wanna make sure that every one of you out there avoids being the ghost this
Anneliese Rhodes: year. Well think about, like, I'm thinking about this, like how many of your physicians can you think of, Cindy, that are direct.
They're direct, right? So they want you, 85% of them, right? They want you to be direct. They don't want you to skirt outta the issue, not talk about it, right? Deny it, ignore it. What they're not telling you is they're probably not gonna call you again because you're not owning your stuff, right? They want you to own your stuff, just like they own their stuff.
They may actually make you feel a little uncomfortable. Well, it is what it is. You're in the big boy game, big girl game, put your big pants on and go. So you can't. Ignore the fact that it's there. You have to talk about it, don't work on it. Number three, is the blame shifter, the person that is, oh, well the shipment didn't come in on time, or, well, my clinical didn't order those for me.
Or, oh, I never got that information from your nurse. You know, like the scheduler didn't call me. I mean, how many times have you. Thought about it, maybe said it, you know, like, oh, well, and the thing is, is you're just trying to shift blame off of you take the heat off of you and put it onto somebody else when again, they just want you to own it.
Right. Have the ownership. fess up to it. I didn't call your scheduler on Monday like I always do, and I missed your case, or I was late to your case, or whatever it was, right? You can't continue shifting blame because then they're gonna be like, oh, you're just skirting around the issue. Why do I even wanna call you anymore?
Cynthia Ficara: And you know, that one might be hard when you're realizing, oh my gosh, it's my mistake and I wanna soften the blow. Don't, yeah, because shifting the blame is gonna make it worse. this job is so hard to get in front of the people you need to get in front of. And every interaction you have is a credibility factor, right?
I mean, almost like if you are not. Engaging as you should be, then you may end up losing credibility. So just when you think it's making it better, people see through that sometimes. So do not be a blame shifter. Okay. The last one that we had is similar to the first one, but we thought it, needed a more direct title.
We call it the over apologizer, so Oh, yeah. This is really just the, I'm so, so, so, so, so sorry. And there was somebody I knew that did this,
Anneliese Rhodes: and it's
Cynthia Ficara: like, you know, it's almost
Anneliese Rhodes: cringeworthy. You're like, oh, stop.
Cynthia Ficara: Please stop. Yeah, because you're, just like unsure of everything. Now, just so you don't get confused, the first one we said was the over explainer.
That's all this long, blah, blah, blah. But this is just, saying, sorry too much and throwing it in. Yes. It takes. All the genuine words out, and you just sound insecure. And it just, well,
Anneliese Rhodes: not only that, but you might be making a bigger deal out of it than it really is. Right? So you're like, oh my gosh, I'm so sorry.
They're like, wow, is that a, is there something bigger there that I didn't know about? Like, sometimes, you know, you do it and they're like, okay, well that's cool. Thanks for that. so yeah, the over apologizer, I know I've heard those people too. Oh.
Cynthia Ficara: I think that those four things
are what we mentioned. you don't wanna be the over explainer, you don't wanna be the ghost. You don't wanna be the blame shifter, and you don't wanna be the over apologizer. Why? Because you almost look like you're making excuses. Mm-hmm. And what we wanna do is give you our first secret of the year.
Yeah. Because I think this is a good time. Like we all have a piece of this or have all done this now. What is the secret to making it better? Okay. So. Would you like to reveal the secret this year, Lisa? No, because I never remember it.
Anneliese Rhodes: I
Ego, Clarity, and Action
Cynthia Ficara: will be 2026. Here we come. Okay. So the secret to apologizing to your customers is this, you need to remove your ego from the room and I think that there's many different ways that you can use different words that we kind of already talked about, but I think that what it really came down to is removing the ego.
If you. A high enough performer to step into that and be able to say, okay, I need to take my ego out of this. I just need to do what's right and move forward. It might not make it so uncomfortable and it might make it better. So we wanted to throw that in there after we gave you these little examples of common mistakes when apologizing to make it all better in 2026.
Yeah.
Anneliese Rhodes: Alright, so let's talk about what does a good. Powerful professional apology look like. So let's break it down. So the very first part of it is, if you're thinking about this right in human thought process, is you need to be direct. You need to lead with clarity. I want to take ownership of something, or Dr.
Smith, I would like to talk to you about something or about a mistake that I made, or I'd like to talk to you about the mistake that I made. Be direct, own it immediately. And again, lead with clarity. I think that's so important. 'cause that also just kind of sets it up for a good conversation overall.
Like now they know, okay, she or he is gonna be direct, they're gonna be clear, they're owning it. Now I'm gonna sit and listen versus, so, you know, I really can, I have five minutes? the whole like that back and forth? No, you just have to be direct with it. Remember, your surgeons
Cynthia Ficara: are direct.
Listening to you say that, I feel like that might also help it go away much faster. You know, when you don't harp on it, you're right. And you don't say it seven times that you just say direct, you apologize and you move on. They may even forget about it later. So that is something that may actually help you.
the second thing that I would say is to state the issue simply and factually. I'm not saying this is super easy, but just simply know this is exactly what happened and state it because they don't need the whole backstory of, well this happened, but because oh, two weeks ago I called so and so and I couldn't get this.
Yeah. Then I went here like over explainer. Mm-hmm. Yeah, exactly. 'cause that pulls that back in. Mm-hmm. So stated directly and then just confirm. unfortunately I did not. Order this in time. I forgot you used the example of, I forgot to call the scheduler or whatever the reason is, but take your ego outta the room and state, simply and factually without a motion, just state it.
Yeah. Let them know the situation, because if it comes down to whatever the mistake is, you have to go forward. So talking over and over and over about something that's already in the past isn't gonna help.
Anneliese Rhodes: Oh my gosh. Yeah, you're right. Okay. Then the third thing to really be aware of is, and I think this is really important, is acknowledge the impact of your mistake, of your decision, of whatever it is that happened.
Right. Without, again, without being emotional, I understand there's a patient on the table. I understand that. Me not. Having the devices in time or you having to call me, in the middle of whatever, and you had to wait on me two hours because I was late. I understand that this impacts the patient.
I think that's very important because I. At the end of the day, again, we talk about this, almost every episode there is a patient on the table. It is your job to handle that situation with the utmost respect and care. And so, and your, physician is expecting that out of you. So I think when you acknowledge the impact of what this looks like to their patients or to their practice or to their time, I understand how important your time is.
I'm sorry that I was late to the meeting. That's
Cynthia Ficara: important. I think this is one of the most important steps. You could be direct, like we said, you could be clear, but when you acknowledge what it did to them. Yeah. Very, very simply in factually, I think that, those words go a long way.
You know, I understand this frustration now, it affects your schedule, or because of my mistake, I realize what this does to you. I mean. It might take three seconds to say it, but I really think that if I'm on the receiving end of somebody in the hospital, that not only did you just say, here's my mistake, I apologize while you take it that step further, and now you're apologizing, but you're acknowledging what it does, how it impacts them, like I just think that makes that apology way.
500 pounds more. And it just really seems to be that much clearer. And again, we're talking about building credibility with your customers this year. And I, truly believe that is actually one of the most important steps, is almost that second part of your apology is apologizing and then acknowledging their part.
I really, really do. Agreed.
Anneliese Rhodes: All right. And then I think the last thing is, if you did mess up, if you did truly screw up. Here's what I'm going to do. You're gonna own the correction moving forward. Here is what I'm gonna do moving forward. I will make sure that I call Jan or Sue every Monday the scheduler to make sure that I am on top of your cases, that I know what's going on, or you missed a case.
I'm gonna make sure that everybody has my cell number in the or. I'm gonna make sure it's posted everywhere, or if you forgot to order something, it's never gonna happen again, because I now have a. Checklist of everything, making sure that I do it and I do it three times over, whatever the fix is, you let them know what it is, you tell them what you're gonna do, and then that's pretty much it, right?
I mean, you need to not harp on this and then you let them talk too. I think that's another thing, Cindy, is you need to let your, give your customers a chance to talk. Give them space to let. You hear how they feel about the situation because I think, yes, you wanna be heard in your apology, but in the same respect, you also need to hear them.
Cynthia Ficara: So well said. And really focus your apology like A good apology will focus more on the future and what you're going to do rather than harping on the failure itself. So then it wouldn't be a secret to medical device if we didn't talk a little bit about the best part, now you know, what not to do, or where you fall in.
Mm-hmm. Now you know what? You can do, but let's just polish it up with how are you going to deliver. It's not always what you say, it's how you say it. There's a tone. There's a delivery. There's a timing because now this is the icing on the cake. This is what's going to make it all better. Whether you say it direct and you're clear, think about the tone.
Okay? This is the first most important part. If you are direct and mean, Oh, I didn't mean to do that. Just being direct, right? You don't want that. But what if you are very calm and confident and you're not defensive? I did not mean to do that. I let my ego leave the room. Yeah, I'm very calm. I'm clear.
But you also need to be a little bit warm. So almost think about, I think this is a good way to think about a tone. If you're making an apology and you want it warm and professional, think about what. Speaking to somebody equal to you, whether it's a teammate, a partner, but not like you would if you were a little kid, you got in trouble and you were speaking to a parent because you know that voice is different.
Anneliese Rhodes: Yep. Oh my gosh. Yeah. I think along with that, it is so important to apologize in person. I just do. Oh, I think, you know, whenever you don't do it on a text message, oh my gosh. find them. Wait for them. After surgery, after clinic, whatever it is, find them and do it if they are out of town or on vacation you need to talk to them on the phone.
Most of us have our surgeons numbers. I think it's so important that we call them, and I will tell you, I think we probably talked about a mistake or two that I have made in the past. I do very clearly remember one, pretty big one. I not only called and talked to him, I went to his office and met with him multiple times.
Cindy and I even wrote, an apology letter. it was a, it was a mistake. I owned it. It was a terrible thing that happened. it's never happened since, but you know, look, we're all human. We all make mistakes. I think that when you, check that ego at the door and you openly and honestly apologize, you acknowledge the impact that it could potentially have on a patient or the physician for that matter, and you're honest with them.
that's all you can do. And you deliver it in a clear, concise, warm way. You know, 'cause you mean it, right? You want it to come from the heart. And I think timing is also really important. Don't wait. Do not wait. You need to make sure that you do it either the same day or the very next morning.
Waiting only makes it worse because now it looks like you're skirting the issue. It looks like you're the ghost person, you know, that we talked about earlier. It is so important to do it as soon as possible so that they understand you truly, you truly mean your apology. You recognize the, the mistake you made and how you're gonna fix it.
From Misstep to Trust
Cynthia Ficara: You're right. So I think that, you know, to, to just recap a little bit of the icing on the cake that we wanna deliver to all of you is just remember when you are delivering this apology, your tone matters, the delivery matters. And you are, I I wanna emphasize again about the texting and the phone because I, I think we're all been around long enough with texting to understand that you can read one sentence and it can be interpreted in four different ways.
So. Absolutely in person. Yeah. And then the last one, timing. Just like you said, sooner is always better. Um, fix it quickly, clearly. I think that just makes it, makes a really big difference. Um, so I would say as a high performer, this is a true, true way. To separate yourself. Yep. And I think that, you know, it doesn't really, something's gonna happen.
It doesn't stop after the apology, you know? Um, you can, you can close the loop on things and go forward, like you just said. Um, I think this is a good idea. When we talked about. Saying going forward, I am going to do X, Y, Z. What if you went there and also follow up the next week. Okay. I just want to confirm this is the new process going forward.
It almost just kind of reiterates some action you are doing. Um, now I, I want to also. Hesitate. I, I mean, what am I trying to say? That's not the word I wanna say. I just wanna make sure that you don't over communicate the next steps. So I think it's important that you can circle back and confirm, but do not over communicate.
You know, just a little touch here. Yeah. And a little touch there. Um, I think that that will kind of help because, um. You know, in your apology, you, you now in any relationship, you've stepped back a couple notches. Now you gotta work on building that trust back up. It's just normal. Just like any relationship you would have with your spouse or you know, your, your best friend.
Like every so often things happen and you're like, oh, now I gotta gain my trust back.
Anneliese Rhodes: Yeah, so I, I really, I think today's conversation was really good. It's a good beginning to 2026. You know, we are all here to become better individuals, humans, partners, work employees, and loyal and trusted advisors with our customers.
And one of the biggest things you can do is learn the art of apologizing in such a way that it communicates to the people that you've either let down or hurt. Or whatever it was, you let them know that you care, that you are going to make, um, a solid effort to fix it and you know that you would like to move through it and move beyond it.
And I think those things are so key when you are. In medical devices, working with patients, working with surgeons and nurses and techs, that's what they expect out of you. So I am so glad that we had this talk today. Cindy, do we have a call to action? Yes, we do, because
Cynthia Ficara: we always do. So I think for all of you, high performance, this one's kind of fun.
It's beginning of the year, so it's gonna be a little more challenging on this. So a lot of what we talked about was apologizing in the moment. Right when something happens or something big, because it is very important, as Lisa mentioned before, sometimes when you have something big that happened, but here's what I want you to think about.
Dig into a little bit of your business and think about an area that maybe wasn't such an obvious mistake. Maybe you just really got slack in following up. Maybe there was a simple thing that you could just, for lack of better words, clean up in your territory. So the challenge, the call to action is to find that one little thing where maybe you weren't your best, and does it need an apology?
Does it mean like, oh, maybe I didn't call you back. As simple as go back to that account, say, I may have not gotten back to you. Um, please accept my apology. I would like to follow up. We left off. What else do I need to do? Make the action go forward. I, I think it's big. So I know every one of you out there has something that they even let go a little bit that I would like you to take this whole thing we learned about with this apology and make it work.
I love it. All right, enjoy.
Anneliese Rhodes: 20 20, 26. Wait, what did I just say? 2026. And have a great week, y'all.
Hey, declutter. This is our snippet. Every rep faces that moment. The device didn't arrive, the misstep, the case case. Can we, can we stop? Say, do you want me to redo that product? Just say, device is what we do. I know, I know. Sorry, declutter. We're gonna redo that. Okay, here we go. Every rep faces that moment.
The moment the product didn't arrive, the misstep in the case, or it went sideways and suddenly you are making the call. You'd give
Cynthia Ficara: anything to avoid. But here's the twist. That apology doesn't weaken you. It becomes the moment your customer trusts you more than ever. And today we are
Anneliese Rhodes: discussing the anatomy of a powerful professional apology.
